When is the final book in the Dragonclaw Trilogy coming?
Let me tell you about my year.
This year, I'd really hoped to write 6 books. I figured it was doable. However, life happened. In February, management at my workplace changed, and my job role was radically altered from being something quite specific and involving a lot of lateral thinking and effort, to something which was (literally) watching an email box to forward emails to another department.
You see, I'd worked hard at this place for a year and a half, to build a certain skillset which gave me a great level of freedom to analyse huge amounts of data, and I'd just begun a project which would have doubled that amount of data. I would have been in a playground of data. I kind of enjoyed the investigative process of finding broken things in data. I was also doing a job which is titled "Reporting Analyst" at most businesses, but was obviously not given that as a title or as a payment package.
So, you can see why when management changed, they didn't know what to do with me and just left me to kind of rot.
I grew very depressed and found it hard to feel motivated on writing. I also found myself getting more and more stressed at work and before work. I couldn't sleep. I worried all the time. I felt like I was drowning all the time, and found myself getting more and more angry as time went by.
In July, they offered me a redundancy package, and I accepted it with, admittedly, some relief. It felt like the gun which had been aimed at me in February had finally pulled its trigger. I was conflicted, though, because I loved working there. I had some good friends and I've now lost most of them. Only two of them reached out afterward to ask if I was okay. And I've felt so messed up that I even forgot my wife's birthday. For me, that's messed up.
So, that added to the whole feeling of being abandoned and having to start again from the very bottom. Again.
Needless to say, my past few months have again been a black hole of depression and anxiety as I watch my reduncancy package slowly shrink as I spent it. And now I'm on the job hunt again. Unsure where to begin and what to do. I want to do something challenging. I want to do something which lets me think. I want that so much. But these roles often come with stipulations requiring degrees and years of experience in a role with the same job title.
I don't have much hope I'll get what I want and am tightening my belt preparing for another unfortunate term in the trenches of Customer Service somewhere. And that's really broken me. I feel the past 10 years in the telecommunications industry has led me to a brick wall and a sign telling me to go back.
On top of that, sales for my books has been extremely low this year. Even The Shivs didn't get the attention I'd hoped it would. I put a lot of heart into that book, and it didn't pay off. I was so proud of it, but I think it's coming clear that my goal to write these more regularly is probably one which will never pay off and I'm best off slowing down and concentrating on building a life.
Anyway. This is why I haven't given you any good news this year and I'm doubtful I will have a book this January. I hope perhaps mid-year next year for the Dragonclaw book and I apologise deeply to any of you who come here searching for a joyful story of announcements and the next book. I don't mean to pull a George RR Martin on you, but I have to eat. And writing just doesn't pay the bills at all.
I won't be abandoning Nysta and the Brides' journey, and will complete both series. But I may need more time than I expected and will be shelving a few other series I had hoped to work on at the same time.
To those of you who understand how this feels, I hope you found a job you liked.
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